By Guy Incognito

This is the story of my second foray into nude recreation, which took place in Oregon at Sauvie Island’s Collins Beach in June of 2006.

A while back I had asked a girl I was acquainted with if she would be willing to check out a nearby clothing-optional beach with me. She said yes at the time, but, without going into too much detail, things did not work out between us and we stopped seeing each other before the weather was warm enough to go. I was very disappointed at the time, but eventually I decided I was not going to let this setback keep me from experiencing the beach for myself. The place I wanted to visit was Collins Beach on Sauvie Island, near Portland, Oregon. I had wanted to visit Portland for a while anyway, so when I had an available weekend in the summertime, I planned a trip there, with the intention of checking out Sauvie Island if the weather cooperated.

That Saturday morning after my arrival in Portland was disappointing. It was cloudy, and much colder than the weather forecast had predicted. I figured that I was not going to get any beach time in that day, so I explored the city and took a look at some of the things worth seeing there.

Around noon, the sun came out and it began to warm up quickly. Once I noticed this, I dropped everything and drove out to Sauvie Island. The island has a lot of farmland on it, and the drive was very scenic. The directions were easy to follow, and I got there without incident… except for one small mix-up. When I first got to where I thought the beach was, I was confused by the fact that all the people there were in bathing suits. It took me a few minutes to realize that I had not gone quite far enough up the road and that I was at one of the textile beaches on the island. Fortunately, I kept all of my clothes on while I was figuring this out!

A few minutes later, I stood at the entrance to the correct beach, as evidenced by the “clothing-optional area” sign posted there. I suddenly became aware that I was very nervous, every bit as nervous as I was when I first went to Sandy Hook. Maybe this was because it had been so long since that trip, or maybe because this was a new place. Either way I had no choice but to deal with it. I took a deep breath and walked through the trees.

At Gunnison Beach, there is a long walkway between the entrance and the water, so you have a minute or two to get used to what you are seeing before you are in among the crowd. Collins Beach is different. Once you walk through the tree line, bam, you are right near the water’s edge… and surrounded by nude sunbathers. Width-wise, the beach is much smaller than Gunnison, and the number of people there is correspondingly smaller (at least it was while I was there). However, there was a decent sized crowd there that day, with several couples, a few single men, and some small groups throughout the open area by entrance #2, where I had just walked in. There was also a group of men playing volleyball at the nets nearby. I found a semi-secluded spot at the southern edge of the crowd to put my stuff, and I quickly undressed and tried to relax.

After I had been there for a while and begun to relax a little bit, I thought I would try a quick swim in the river. As I headed towards the water, I noticed that absolutely no one else on the beach was swimming. I soon found out why once I stepped in. The water was FREEZING! It took me a minute to work up the courage to go in further. I had not expected it to be so cold, but I had come this far, so I figured I might as well go for it. I gradually waded in until I was up to my neck, but the cold took my breath away. I considered the possibility of hypothermia and decided not to go completely underwater. Eventually I got used to it somewhat and started to swim around, although I was careful to keep my head above water. The current was very mild that day. I felt that river swimming was much more enjoyable than ocean swimming, if only it had been warmer. The view was better too… I preferred the lush green forests on the far side of the river to the vast emptiness of the Atlantic Ocean. Looking south, I was surprised to see that the textile beachgoers on Walton Beach could plainly view the nude sunbathers on Collins beach, and vice-versa. I would have expected that more separation would have been enforced. It didn’t bother me, though.

Before too long, the extreme cold made it unpleasant to continue swimming, so I waded back to shore and headed to my towel. On the way, I passed by a small group of sunbathers, both men and women.

“Is the water cold?” one of the women called out to me as I passed.

“It is EXTREMELY cold!” I told her.

“Yeah, it looks like it,” she said with a smile.

What did she mean by that, I wondered, blushing.

Then she said, “I could see you shivering from here.”

So she wasn’t implying anything after all, I thought, relieved. I then realized that I had just had my first socially-nude conversation. It hadn’t been very impressive, but… oh well, baby steps.

Once I had dried off somewhat, I thought I would take a walk and see how far the beach extended. I was not quite comfortable leaving all my things unattended, so I gathered it all up and carried it with me. Past the volleyball nets, the beach narrows a bit, with bushes and other vegetation growing very close up to the river’s edge. Soon, I came upon a couple sunbathing. The woman was lying down with her eyes closed, but the guy was sitting up… and giving me a very dirty look. I wasn’t sure why, unless he thought I was leering at his wife/girlfriend. I didn’t think I was, so I ignored him and continued on.

A little bit further, there was a guy sitting by himself near a small tree. When I got a little closer, I was shocked to see that he was slowly stroking himself. He brazenly continued even after he saw that I had noticed what he was doing. I was not so naïve as to be unaware that these things went on at nude beaches occasionally, but I was still surprised and a little bit disappointed to be actually witnessing it. Perhaps I should have said something, but considering it was my first time there I thought it would be best to mind my own business. At this point I was also wondering where the clothing-optional area ended, as there were no signs anywhere in sight. I was certainly not about to ask either of the men there about it, so I decided to play it safe and turned around to head back to the southern end. As it turns out, the beach extended quite a ways further north, but I didn’t find that out until later. The first man continued to scowl at me as I passed by him again. Strangely, he did not seem the least bit bothered by what the other guy was doing not twenty feet away from him.

The rest of the afternoon was uneventful. I stayed at my chosen spot, sometimes watching the volleyball game that was ongoing throughout the day, or else watching the river and the occasional ship that passed by. Eventually it was time to go. I left with mixed feelings about the day, but I fully intended to return the next day if the weather cooperated.

As it turned out, that Sunday morning was overcast and very chilly. It did not look like there was going to be good beach weather, so I did some more sightseeing in Portland throughout the morning. By mid-afternoon I had run out of things to do, and was considering going home. It had warmed up a little bit, but the sky was still cloudy. Instead, I drove back out to Sauvie Island, crossing my fingers that the sun would come back out.

The beach had fewer people than the day before, at least when I first showed up. I recognized a small handful of them from Saturday. The volleyball players from the day before were there, and continued playing throughout the afternoon. Among the newcomers, I noticed a Hispanic family of several men and women of various ages, along with their children. The entire family was dressed (not in swimsuits, but FULLY dressed, which I found odd). However, they were not leering at anyone or doing anything inappropriate, so it didn’t bother me.

The sun stayed hidden, and every so often one of the couples or small groups there would pack up and go home. I started wondering if perhaps I should go home as well, but decided to tough it out. It gradually warmed up some more as the time went by. Eventually some new arrivals started showing up, until there was a decent crowd there (though still not as many as the day before).

While I was sitting there, I saw a woman taking a walk up the beach along the water’s edge. She appeared to be in her mid to late thirties, had short blonde hair, and was strikingly attractive. What I noticed most about her, though, was how she seemed to exude this aura of confidence. Although she was alone, she was completely at ease; she was not trying to be seen, but not bothered by being seen either. It’s hard to put into words, but I could sense it. At one point she stopped as a huge container ship was sailing by, hopped up on a log lying in the water with her back towards me, and shielded her eyes from the sun to watch the ship pass. I couldn’t help watching her for a bit as she did this; it was quite a scene with her standing there and the ship in the distance. For some reason all I could think was what an amazing naturist photograph that would have made.

Part of me wanted to talk to this woman, not to hit on her (she was at least ten years older than me, and I prefer girls that are about my own age), but because her confidence interested me and piqued my curiosity. However, I didn’t have any reason to talk to her that I could use to break the ice. Besides, I figured she would not appreciate being approached by some random Single Male, so I decided not to bother her.

Later on, I was in the mood for taking a walk of my own. I was bolder now and left everything behind, despite my uneasiness at leaving all my stuff unattended. I headed past the main crowd and the volleyball nets. Further on, I passed a nude couple walking in the other direction, holding hands, who had arrived on a small boat anchored nearby. Beyond them, the beach was fairly deserted for a while.

I got a little further north, where the trees and brush are close to the water’s edge, when I had another unsettling experience. There was some old guy, fully dressed, standing back in the bushes, not doing anything other than standing there staring towards the river. When he noticed me coming closer, he immediately squatted down in the bushes. I have no idea what he thought he was doing. If he was trying to hide, he was not doing a very good job as he was still plainly visible. He didn’t say anything and wasn’t doing anything else inappropriate, but I got a very bad vibe. I was already feeling uncomfortable with my stuff being so far out of sight, so this was enough to make me turn around and head back to my towel.

Near the boat, I once again passed the young couple I had seen earlier, both still holding hands and in love with each other. As I passed them, I felt a twinge of regret as I thought of the girl I had asked to come with me. What those two were doing was exactly what I had wanted to experience when I had asked her… walking along, holding hands with a beautiful girl, in this beautiful place on a beautiful day. I had come very close, but missed my chance, and now I had no idea when, or if, I’d ever have that chance again.

When I passed the volleyball net, it appeared that the men playing earlier were taking a break, and now a handful of younger, twenty-something people were there playing. Among them were several young women, all wearing shorts and bikini tops. As I walked by, the girl nearest to me turned, and we happened to make eye contact briefly. She did not smile, and I felt a quick flush of embarrassment. I suppose I am still not yet completely at ease being nude around people who are clothed, especially when those people are young, pretty, and female.

I returned to my towel, and lay there watching the river flow by for a while. Suddenly, I heard a giggle. I turned my head and saw a boy of about nine years old or so looking at me from the entrance to the beach. When he saw me turn he quickly ran back behind the trees. Before long, though, he was back, with another kid about his age and two women who I assumed were their mothers. They all went down to the water’s edge, and the kids played in the water while their mothers talked. All four of them stayed dressed. Although I didn’t mean to eavesdrop, they were just close enough that I could hear bits and pieces of their conversation. You could tell from the kids’ giggles and comments that they found the idea of a clothing-optional beach funny. The mothers, though, obviously disapproved of what the rest of us were doing (which was simply sitting around, talking, or playing volleyball), and I heard them make several hurtful and judgmental remarks. This began to get on my nerves. I could completely understand that not everyone in the world approved of nude recreation. But if it offended them, why come into our midst to be offended by it, especially when there were several other perfectly good clothing-required beaches nearby (one of which was only a few hundred feet up the road)? And why expose their children to it?

After a few minutes, I saw the blonde woman I had noticed earlier walking along the beach again. When she got to where the two mothers were talking, she stopped to say hello. They exchanged pleasantries and chatted for a few minutes. I didn’t hear much of anything they said. However, once the blonde woman moved on, the other two waited until she was out of earshot and began to make some snide remarks about her, and this time I did pick up a few snippets of their conversation.

“Who does she think she is, coming up to us completely naked and talking to us like it’s nothing?” one of them said.

“Well, I guess to these people, it is nothing,” the other said. So maybe one of them, at least, was beginning to understand the nudist point of view.

The first woman disagreed, and that was about all I heard clearly. It bothered me that the blonde woman had gone out of her way to be friendly to these two, and their reaction had been thinly veiled contempt. For a second, I mischievously considered going over to say hi to them myself, but I quickly nixed that idea. They talked for a while longer, until they decided it was getting late and headed back to the road with their kids. As they left, I heard one of the boys make a final wisecrack that I was fairly sure was about me, but I said nothing. I was not sorry at all to see them go. I could easily overlook the kids’ discourteous behavior; after all, they were too young to know any better. But to have these two adult women walking around, watching everyone, passing judgment and making disparaging comments, like we were animals in some zoo exhibit… I just found it extremely rude and annoying, and I was relieved once they had finally left.

Fortunately, the sun had come out from behind the clouds by this time, and I decided I would try a quick swim while I had the chance. I headed down to the river, but once I stepped in I hesitated for a second. The water was every bit as cold as it had been the day before! It was not going to get any warmer, though, so I waded in deeper. I was a bit braver this time and actually dived underwater, submerging myself completely. The frigid water took my breath away just as it had the day before, but I swam around hoping that I would get used to it.

Looking back towards the beach, I was surprised to see that I had inspired at least one other person to try out the water. One of the women in a small group nearby had stood up and was wading into the river. What seemed odd to me, though, was that rather than going straight on into the river, she was coming in at an angle. Then I realized that she was coming directly towards me! She stopped a respectful distance away, just close enough to be able to talk without shouting. I tried to smile at her but could only shiver, and we both laughed.

“How’s it going?” I asked her.

“Good… I just wanted to see if I had the courage to swim in this,” she told me. We chatted a bit and she went on to tell me about other places in the area that she went skinny-dipping in when she was younger and in college. I was completely caught off guard by how friendly and open she was being with me, a total stranger. Unfortunately for me, I started feeling shy and couldn’t think of anything to say to continue the conversation. I’m not skilled at small talk with new people in the best of circumstances, but especially not with a woman, while both of us are nude, AND while standing neck-deep in breathtakingly cold water! Rather than just stand there in awkward silence, I resumed swimming around a bit, and she headed back to shore to rejoin her companions.

I swam around, feeling frustrated by my poor conversation skills, when I noticed that this woman’s friends seemed familiar. Then it hit me… her female friend was the woman who had called out to me the day before! The two of them were most likely regulars and appeared to be friendly enough towards newcomers. It seemed like I had a chance to make some new friends, so I considered going over to them and asking to join them for a bit, and maybe apologize for my lack of friendliness earlier. Since the husband of one of them was also there, maybe they would have been less likely to think I had any ulterior motives. I wanted to, but I just couldn’t think of what to say to them. My second’s hesitation cost me, as I saw them start to gather their stuff up and call it a day.

I stayed in the water for a few more minutes, until I finally could not stand the cold any longer and headed back to my towel. It was late in the afternoon by now, and most of the people had left for the day. Someone had packed up the volleyball net, and the people still on the beach had consolidated into a big group near the water’s edge. Since they all seemed to know each other, I assumed they were regulars also. The confident blonde woman was among them, but I had given up on making any new friends that day. I let myself dry off in the sunlight for a while, and then reluctantly got dressed and headed back to my car to begin the long drive home.

So there you have it… my second clothing-optional beach experience. Overall, it was a positive one, and I met a few nice people, although I met a few not-so-nice people too. Compared to Gunnison, there seemed to be more of a community atmosphere at Collins Beach, maybe due to the fact that fewer people go there, and more of them are regulars who know each other already. I also found swimming in the Columbia River more enjoyable than the Atlantic Ocean, though the low temperatures put a damper on it. For any newcomers out there, I would strongly recommend checking it out, in spite of the few uncomfortable moments I experienced there. I would suggest that anyone going for the first time should stick close to the open area at the southern end near entrance #2 (where the volleyball nets are), since that seems to be where the “true nudists” congregate. Further north, it is more secluded and you can get more privacy, but this also seems to be where the creepy behavior goes on. I’d also suggest that any single women planning to go bring a friend along with them, but that’s probably good advice for any CO beach. But above all, if you do go, please post about it!

[Home] [My Friends' Writings] [Previous] [Next]